Tuesday, December 04, 2007

The Mystery That Is Brian Billick Blowing Kisses

Hoo-boy! What a game. Rife with sub-plots of the quest for perfection, conspiracy theory and referee incompetence, this was a Monday night game for the ages. Bloggers and news-monkeys are babbling everywhere about these topics, completely ignoring what I think is the most compelling drama of the contest.

What the hell did Rodney Harrison say to Brian Billick? What made BB suddenly mouth sultry, sexy air-kisses, not once, but three times in succession?

Hmm. There are a few possibilities.


RH: Hi, Brian. How are you today?

BB: [Kiss, kiss, kiss.]


RH: Dammit, Brian. I miss you. I miss you real bad, like a ho misses crack. Can I have you tonight?

BB: [Kiss, kiss, kiss.]


RH: Hey, Brian, what do you think of Rosie O'Donnell?

BB: [Kiss, kiss, kiss.]


RH: Brian, I was wondering... How did you feel when you first saw 2girls1cup.com?

BB: [Kiss, kiss, kiss.]


RH: Brian! Pretend I'm your sister!

BB: [Kiss, kiss, kiss.]


RH: Brian, it's raining semen. What do you do?

BB: [Kiss, gulp, kiss.]

An hour ago, this was all funny in my head. Think you can do better? Let's hear it.


  1. RH: I'm just a safety, standing in front of an opposing coach, asking him to love him.

    /satire of gayass movie wuote I read on some emo girl's facebook page.

  2. Proctologist: No need to blush, your asshole is very tight!

    BB: Phhhhhhh (exhaling through pursed lips).