Thursday, August 03, 2006

My blood runs cold. My memory has just been sold.

[Cue J. Geils Band]

She was pure like snowflakes, no one could ever stain. The memory of my Amber could never cause me pain. Years go by I'm lookin' through a girly magazine, and there's my Seagal Amber on the pages in-between!


My blood runs cold. My memory has just been sold. My Amber is the centerfold! Amber is the centerfold!


Na, na, nananananna, nananannnana, nananannanaaaaaaaaaaa.....

[J. Geils band - SHUT UP!]

Say it isn't so!!!

The Seattle PI reports that former Seagal eye candy Amber Lancaster has not only moved on (dammit), but she is making a success of things.

It's enough to break your heart. But at least she's true to her team:

"Most recently, I was the national spokesmodel for Makita Power Tools (Miss Makita '05), I was one of the top 5 winners in Maxim's Hometown Hotties Contest '04, I was an NFL Cheerleader for the Seattle Seahawks -- and no, I don't want to talk about the Superbowl :(........I was Miss Hawaiian Tropic USA and Miss Washington Teen USA."

Also, regarding some work she will be doing for Maxim, interviewing Quarterbacks in Pittsburgh:

""Of all places," Amber said of Pittsburgh, still seething over last year's Super Bowl. "I'll spit on the field when I get there.""

Now that's a lady I can admire, inside & out. Possible ring of honor candidate? Maybe. Let just wait and see if there are any nude scenes in her up-and-coming movie roles.

I still love you, Amber. PLEASE COME BACK...

(to comment, click the green number to the right of the title above)

8 comments:

  1. I love blogging. None of those fishwrap writers could get away with crap like this.

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  2. [i]"I'll spit on the field when I get there."[/i]

    What a dilemma! Wanting to lick the spit of the lucious Ms. Amber off the ground but not wanting to touch your tongue to that hell-hole (Heintz Field, that is!)

    Looks like you're trying to give the boys at KMS a run for their money. With the way things got hot and heavy in the SeahawkBlue Lounge last night, I thought this might be a spill over from the pics posted over there!

    P.S. Jfer digs me!

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  3. What does Jfer Standfer anyways? Jennifer? If so, than what does Tfer stand for? Just curious.

    That said, I saw the article earlier, but apparently didn't read through until I saw the quotes from her here. Very cool chick apparently...she has Seattle Rock written all over her! Shes over here on the east coast hmm? Watch out hen, cause here comes the rooosssssttteeerrrrr YEAAAAHHHH! (lil Seattle reference there)

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  4. Pic1: "Duhhhh in the headlights"
    Pic2: "Amber has apparently been demoted to the 'second string'"

    Oh, sorry. I thought this was TWM.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Nice Alice reference adp.

    Why doesn't my mechanic look like that? Luckily he doesn't dress thatway.

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  6. I am endlessly jealous that I didn't write this post. Kissing Suzy Kolber has apparently been asleep at the wheel.

    I'm just going to thow this out there, Amber... I wanna marry you.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Oh, come on! She's not that great; as a graphic designer I know how these slick lad mags Photoshop their models. With my insider graphics connections, I've obtained one of the original photos from this shoot. Enjoy!

    ReplyDelete
  8. CC:

    Ha! Like Amber wants to share her muffin box for life with a freaking caveman.

    You've been watching too many GEICO commercials.



    CK:

    Ewwwwww...Where in the %$@# did she pick up that outfit? I think I know....

    ReplyDelete