From ESPN.com Horse Racing News, we observe "Bengal's Chad Johnson vs. Horse in Benefit Race."
"Cincinnati Bengals all-pro wide receiver Chad Johnson will race a horse at River Downs in Cincinnati, Ohio on Belmont Stakes Day, June 9, as a fund-raiser for Feed the Children, an Oklahoma City-based charity that provides food, medicine, clothing, and other necessities to children around the world. The race, billed as "man vs. beast," will be held on the turf course, with Johnson starting at the sixteenth pole and the horse, Restore the Roar, starting at the eighth pole."
Not only is he going to race for charity, but he has also donated sports memorabilia to be sold at a silent auction.
To pledge one's efforts to such a cause is commendable. But with Johnson's recent, ummm, track record, you have to wonder if he'll actually pony up or stiff them like an ass.
This event is literally teeming with punchlines. Why don't you help me write some of them while I mule it over.