For most of the free world, the only two thing in life that are guaranteed are death and taxes.
If you're a Seahawks fan, you can add Pulled Pork to that list.
That's Pulled Pork, as in Floyd "Pork Chop" Womack, the oft injured reserve lineman for the Seahawks, who once again has pulled something in his knee two days into mini-camp.
Maybe he was just born with brittle bones and inelastic tendons. Maybe he has a thing for the soft touch and smooth massages of the Seahawks trainers. Or maybe he's just as good an insurance policy as that Trojan you've been carrying in your wallet since high school.
For whatever reason though, The Other White Meat just can't make it as a featured entree.
While Walter Jones was skipping training camps, in retaliation for being franchised, Pork Chop kept his left tackle position warm until Big Walt got tired of pushing his Escalade around and checked in for the regular season.
Slated to be the starting right tackle in 2005, a training camp injury once again sidelined Spare Rib, and Sean Locklear established himself as the starter during the epic Superbowl season.
Last year, Hamsteak was supposed to be the heir-apparent to the left guard position left vacant by the poison-pill pusher, Steve Hutchinson. Make that the err-apparent, because again, old Pork ended up with his medalions in a sling, and missed most of the season.
On the plus side, he's been in Mike Holmgren's offense for several years, and can step in at any position except center. On the minus side, chances are good that he'll twist and ankle or pull a hamstring just by stepping in.
He must have great pictures of someone high up in the Seattle organization, otherwise it's hard to understand how someone who has taken less game time snaps, than the number of body parts he has had snapped, can remain on the roster.
And with the way the Seahawks have cut ties with injured players at other positions, like Andre Dyson, Kelly Herndon and Josh Scobey, old Pork Chop may find out that nursing yet another pre-season injury just ain't Kosher.